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Fascination Over Frustration

Date03 Jan, 2022
Type Team Optimization
Author Emily LePan

Have you ever wondered how someone could possibly have reacted that way? Been upset over that? Seen it that way?

Have you ever wondered how someone could possibly have reacted that way? Been upset over that? Seen it that way? Has someone’s perspective frustrated you so much that you can only roll your eyes and dig in your heels and hold tight to the belief that you are right…that they are wrong?

For some, being around people who don’t think the same, act the same, vote the same, love the same or look the same, is confronting. It causes discomfort. It makes them unrelatable. It makes us default to thinking they are wrong; I am right. In truth, it is activating something in us that has more to do with our sh*t than it does with their point of view.

What if I told you that changing your perspective to one of fascination could expand your mindset and your acceptance, and lead you to a whole new way of being. That simple shift of being so wildly fascinated with someone’s perspective could change your life and your year.

This deep curiosity is really at the heart of all coaching work. Being SO curious about the human condition and the perspectives we hold can be the real key to letting go of tight beliefs that are often rooted in opinion and not fact. Letting go of perspectives can also be the real key to pattern-breaking, growth, and lasting change.

Be so fascinated with the behaviour of others and your frustration will dissipate. We aren’t judging. We aren’t voting right or wrong, yes or no. We are observing and tapping into our curiosity.

Try to push yourself to be more open-minded. Try to break patterns of your limiting beliefs. Just because that’s the way it’s always been and what you have always believed, it is still possible there is another way. It is possible that someone who is different than you could actually help you grow the most.

Here are a few directives. I would be so curious to know why you wouldn’t at least give them a shot:

Instead of ‘They are so defensive. Why do they get their back up like that?’, try ‘Wow, that really upset them. I wonder what they are afraid of?’

Instead of ‘Those people all think that way because they are stupid’, try ‘I’m so curious as to how they make decisions. I wonder what life is like for them?’

Instead of judging, try listening.

Instead of assuming, try asking.

Instead of confronting, try curiosity.

Instead of frustration, try fascination.